Life Coach and therapist dr Larry Cohen Explains. New Jersey Therapy and Life Coaching is located in Voorhees NJ, Marlton NJ, and Cherry Hill NJ (856) 352-5428 ContacT New Jersey Therapy and Life Coaching

Stop Exhaustion and BURNOUT: A Life Coach’s Guide

We all need a vacation. This week, I have been researching our next one - where to stay and how to pay for it. When you work for yourself like I do, you don’t get paid vacation days, so when I take a vacation, the cost is the vacation itself and the cost of not getting paid for the days I take off. Bummer.

Traditionally, we rent a place at the Jersey shore for a week - 10 days would be great (my relaxation sweet spot), but it’s not easy to find a 10-day rental. The place we’ve stayed in the past is now double the cost it was just three years ago, so I’ve been searching for a new place to rent. I am exhausted just trying to organize my vacation. HELP!

I take time off because to be at my best, I must wind down and get away. Taking a vacation resets me. However, I sometimes experience exhaustion and feel I need a break in between vacations. This got me thinking about and researching exhaustion and burnout, and how to avoid them in the first place.

Burnout isn’t just tiredness—it’s a deep-seated exhaustion that makes everything feel harder than it should be. As a life coach, I’ve worked with countless people who feel trapped by their day-to-day lives: work, stress, exhaustion, repeat. This is what I tell them (and, today, myself.)

Stop pretending you’re okay

Denial is often the first stage of burnout. Sounds bizarre, but it’s true. We convince ourselves that we can “power through” without a break. Everyone else is managing, so we should be able to as well. But the truth is that burnout thrives in silence. Denial feeds exhaustion and burnout because you don’t acknowledge that you’re feeling it. The moment you admit it, the faster you can correct it.

Figure out what’s depleting you

Burnout isn’t because of one thing (like work). Take an inventory of all areas of your life: work, relationships, health, and everyday habits. Be insightful and dig deep. Is your job burning you out? Okay, that’s an obvious offender. What about your people-pleasing tendencies? Your lack of boundaries? Your unwillingness to work on yourself? How much fear and anxiety do you experience every day because you haven’t addressed difficult issues?

What is rest?

Rest isn’t just sleeping more, though that helps. It’s also emotional and mental recovery. Do you need more time to yourself? To read or distract yourself with hobbies? Maybe you need laughter. Netflix might be the next stop. Maybe your soul needs nature, music, or meditation. Work to discover what recharges you, and schedule it into your calendar. If you don’t, you won’t.

Learn to say “no”

Overcommitting yourself almost always leads to exhaustion and burnout. To please others, you always say yes when you want to say no, and you take on more than you should. This depletes your energy. You are sacrificing your own needs for the needs of someone else. Start setting some healthy boundaries. Learn to say no. Others may get annoyed sometimes, but I suspect you also get annoyed at them.

Reconnect with your inner purpose

Burnout separates you from your sense of purpose. You become caught in a routine and lose touch with what once inspired or excited you. It's essential to take time to reassess your values. How do you envision your days? What type of life are you creating? Reconnection to what’s most important can rekindle your inner passion.

Stop begging for your worth

It can be hard to accept, but sometimes when we feel low, we turn to others to validate us. Burnout often stems from the belief that we must earn a break or be productive to be valuable (I fall for this every day). It’s not true, of course. You are valuable just for being alive. You are worthy simply because you live on Earth. Let go of the pressure to prove yourself constantly. When you truly believe in yourself, you will treat yourself better.

Simplify

When you’re burned out, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. Start simplifying your life. Learn to automate tasks, delegate where possible, clean out your calendar, and stop pressuring yourself to do it all. Clearing your schedule, mind, and space frees up more energy for what matters most.

Be around supportive people

Avoid people who push you. Be with people who love and care about you and your well-being, and remind you that being human is okay. Seek out those who make you feel safe and seen, not just productive.

Choose yourself

Recovering from exhaustion means valuing yourself every day, even when it feels bad and when you disappoint others. You deserve to live a good, happy life.

Recognize that burnout and exhaustion are signs. They are telling you to change. Take inventory, recognize what needs to change, and follow through. Your life coach can help you every step of the way.