The Importance of Challenging and Changing Negative Core Beliefs

Dr. Larry Cohen, Therapist and Life Coach, Voorhees NJ (856) 352-5428 Contact NJ Therapy & Life Coaching

As a therapist and life coach, I help clients identify what are called “core belief systems”.“ A core belief is how you see yourself and what you think you are in your life and in the world. For example, “I am lovable” or “ I AM UNLOVABLE. “I AM WORTHY,” “I AM UNWORTHY.” “I AM A SUCCESS,” OR “I AM a failure.“ These are all core beliefs, and there can be multiple core beliefs about yourself.

Most often, core beliefs aren’t what we think moment to moment. They get triggered in the back of our minds and directly affect our thinking, our behaviors, and our interactions with others.

What we believe about ourself and who we are directly affects our thought processes, which leads to how we feel from moment to moment.

As your thoughts lead to your feelings, and your feelings lead to your behaviors, negative core beliefs can cloud your thinking. Before thoughts come core beliefs - which impact how you think, how you feel and how you behave.

Negative core beliefs lead to negative thinking. For example, if you believe you are a failure, you may avoid looking for a better job, as you think you won’t be able to get one. But if your core belief is that you are a success, you will think that you can get a better job, you will look for one, and find one.

It is important to recognize that your core beliefs effect how you see and experience everything in your world. If your core beliefs effect your thinking, then recognizing and challenging negative core beliefs is essential. These beliefs effect your sense of self-worth, as well as how you communicate with your significant other and the people you interact with every day.

Challenging and changing your negative core beliefs can improve feelings of self-worth, and I believe that if you challenge and change negative core beliefs, you can change your life.

To challenge and change negative core beliefs it is important to review the evidence that this belief is true. Are you really unworthy? I doubt it. There are good and bad experiences in our lives. Do you believe you are truly an unworthy person? When challenges have presented themselves, were you able to resolve your problems? Most of us have the ability to find resolution and move forward. We are all worthy.

When we examine the negative core belief “I am unlovable”, it is essential to reflect of whether you believe all children are lovable. Reflect on the children in your life. Do you really believe any of them are unlovable?

Remember that you too were once a child, as lovable and valuable as all the children born. The belief that you are unlovable may have started when you were young. Were you loved unconditionally, or were you judged and rejected? See Examing Core Beliefs and Negative Thinking.

You can build self-worth by looking at the evidence that supports or does not support your core beliefs. Most often, we discover that our negative core beliefs are faulty. Once realized, work hard TO CHANGE your assumptions about yourself. Use affirmations to help alter your negative core beliefs, and always challenge self-judgment by examining the evidence.