How to Move Forward When the Unexpected occurs

Dr Larry Cohen Therapist Voorhees NJ and Life Coach (856) 352-5428. Contact NJ Therapy & Life Coaching

Unexpected life changes can be the scariest experiences we face. Some changes are good, bringing happiness and even joy. But others are scary and overwhelming, making us uncertain and afraid of the future. As frightening as they are, is it possible to see unexpected changes as a chance to grow and to see our future moving in a new, positive direction? Are there opportunities to be found? Even if the answer is no, WE CAN USE SKILLS to help us cope and be resilient in the face of change.

Acceptance is a crucial step in coping with life changes. We may feel tremendous anxiety, fear, sadness, and even anger in the face of change. Don’t minimize your feelings, and understand that it’s okay to feel them. When your emotions calm, see the situation as it is and accept what has happened. Acceptance allows us to see things as they are and begin building our new future. Victimhood is a common way of seeing yourself in such circumstances, but acceptance allows you to regroup and start moving forward.

The Importance of Perspective

Work hard at seeing change as an opportunity. While new and uncomfortable, changing your way of seeing your circumstances is essential. If you view the change from a new perspective, you may see the need to learn new skills or change the direction of your life. You may even discover more positive ways of being. Just because you were comfortable with how things were doesn’t mean it was the best way to be.

Take time to be self-reflective. Sometimes, it takes time to know how this change impacts us. Don’t get caught in fear. It is essential to keep moving forward regardless of scary feelings. Be careful not to catastrophize. The worst-case scenario rarely happens, and having a positive outlook will help you move through this. Self-reflection allows you to identify your strengths, values, and personal goals, which can guide you toward positive change.

It is helpful to talk about the change and your feelings about it with someone like a trusted friend - someone in your inner circle - or a therapist or life coach - those who can offer guidance, understanding, and empathy. A therapist or life coach can help you with insight into the change and how to learn from it. Journaling can also help you gain clarity and understanding. Write down how things have changed and how you can use the change as an advantage.

Daily Structure

In times of change, developing and sticking with a daily structure is helpful. This can provide a sense of stability in an unstable time. As simple as it sounds, find activities that distract you or bring you joy and relaxation. A routine helps stabilize your emotional health and allows you to see the change as it is, not as you fear it is. Also, establish good self-care, including what you eat, EXERCISE, and meditating. Make sure you pay attention to your sleep habits and make sure you are getting the rest you need. Good self-care strengthens you and lets you focus clearly on the issues.

Reflecting on and having gratitude for what you do have in your life has a healing and calming effect. I recommend making a gratitude list where you write down things you are grateful for in your life. To promote a positive attitude, listening to motivational or inspirational podcasts can also help keep you moving positively.

Measuring Success

Be careful to measure your successes realistically. Keep in mind that small changes often lead to more significant changes. Face adversity with intelligence and courage. Brainstorming with those you trust helps if you feel lost or stuck. If you are lost in the clouds or feel weighed down by worry and fear, remember your past successes -  how you got to where you are today, pulling motivation and positive energy from those experiences.

Sometimes, the best thing about being alive is experiencing the things you least expect. But other times, unexpected changes Can cause significant fear and require new ways of coping and acting. Be mindful and focus on the present, finding gratitude and strength from within. In times of great difficulty or fear, turn to those you love and who love you for support and guidance. To learn more, read about UNMET Expectations and Letting Go Of Resentments. if you do the next right thing as you move from moment to moment, you will always find your way to self-respect and safety.